Just a few thoughts at the end of the day . . .

Allan Rock has now dropped out of the race for Liberal leader. Does anyone want this job? Good salary, massive expense account, comely young interns - dudes, I'm available.

The reconstruction of my beloved Raptors continues with today's trade of Jalen Rose, one of the most interesting people ever to play basketball in Toronto. We lost on the talent end of the deal, but in the big picture it will help bring the franchise back to respectability. Gotta love Wayne Embry.

Did anyone ever look at Helen Hunt and think she had star quality? Mad About You and As Good As It Gets were two of the most overrated products of the '90s. The fact that she has an Oscar while, for example, Julianne Moore does not is a travesty.

I have been listening to Dashboard Confessional on my Dell DJ all week. Great stuff.

Giant magazine was incredibly clever and original when it debuted a little over a year ago, but now it isn't as distinctive. Not sure why they altered their approach (especially the wiseass footnotes), but they still put out a pretty good magazine, and it's hard to get too upset with anyone who puts Kate Beckinsale on their cover.

Good night, and good luck.

I have been receiving the Toronto Star in my home on a free eight-week trial, and while I don't have time to read much beyond the sports and entertainment news, and a bit of politics, I have learned a few interesting things. For instance, one fairly new trend amongst women is to wear their pants tucked into their boots. I hadn't noticed this on my own, so I started looking and, sure enough, saw more than a few occurrences of this phenomena. Now, participating in this trend requires two things: high boots and slim pants. Since both of these are worn to best effect by - if not limited to - tall slender women, the result of this trend is to take their long slim legs and make them seem longer and slimmer, while reducing the distance between their exposed footwear and their midsection. This makes it a trend of the already attractive, and sure enough, the women I observed were, as a whole, more physically attractive than the norm.

As if to put an exclamation mark on the above, before writing this I left my office and headed to the street below to buy a drink. While walking, I noticed a girl with a bottom that could only have been blessed by the hand of God himself. Not surprisingly, her pants were tucked into her mid-calf high boots. It proves nothing, and I guess means nothing, other than giving me another part of the female figure to appreciate. Damned fine trend, that.

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I have been reading a very dangerous book this week. It's called "Make Your Own Damn Movie!", and it's written by a filmmaker named Lloyd Kaufman, whose best known work is probably The Toxic Avenger (it's the only one I had ever heard of before). What makes the book so dangerous is that it is hysterical. Kaufman has made a ton of low budget movies, and clearly his greatest asset in surviving this lifestyle choice has been his sense of humour. Kaufman's profane rants have led me to laugh out loud while on the subway, hence the danger, since anyone standing alone on the subway and laughing is a person to keep a safe distance away from. I have tried to hold the laughter in, but this only makes things worse. I have noticed people looking at me on two occasions, but what can I do? The guy is hilarious.

As an aside, it is also a very useful book for the budding filmmaker, with common sense tips from the real world of movies, as well as lots of stories to warn you of the many things that can go wrong. Mostly, it's an affirmation of a man's love of movies, and the lengths to which he has gone to make his way in the art and business of cinema. It's a stirring read that will inspire and thrill you.

Besides, where else can you learn how to shoot a scene where a guy gets stabbed to death in the ass by a live chicken? These are the kind of things they just don't teach enough of in film school.

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I think I've made it clear that I don't have any interest in children just because they're children. A kid has to be interesting as a person, not as an example of breeding. Today, one of the lawyers had her daughter in for a tour, and this little girl was great. Not even two years old, she's cute as a button and seems like a really intelligent aware child. So while I'm watching her roll around on the floor with her mom, I hear a secretary near me say, in a snotty voice, "Doesn't she have a baby-sitter?" This surprised me coming from a woman, but then I had a revelation: people who have no chance of ever having sex hate children, since kids are the one visible concrete result of sex. Scratch a grossly obese 50ish spinster, and underneath you'll find Miss Hannigan from Annie. Well, either that or a soft creamy chocolate-filled centre.

* * * * *

I haven't paid much attention to his doings the last few years, but I wonder why no one seems to have suggested yet that Jean Charest would make a good replacement for Paul Martin. A sitting Liberal premier, he is well-liked nationally, has extensive federal experience and, notwithstanding his past as a Tory cabinet minister and leader, is more ideologically akin to the Liberals than he is to the Stephen Harper Conservatives. In fact, to even use any word stemming from "ideology" in connection with the Liberals is a joke, so that shouldn't be a problem. Charest may be concerned about seeming opportunist, he may view his work in Quebec as unfinished, he may harbour intentions of joining up with Harper - who can say? All I know is that I would happily vote for him as PM. Had he replaced Mulroney and not Kim Campbell in 1993, I believe the last dozen years in our nation's history would be very different, and we would never have seen a Harper victory, and maybe not even a Martin one. Time to get back on track.

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Continuing in my efforts to catch up on classic movies, I last night watched Hitchcock's The 39 Steps, which was just wonderful. The main thing I have noticed with these old movies is how quickly they jump into the story, with character information and any necessary back story coming at you on the fly. As a result, the films are shorter (this one was under 90 minutes) but simply packed with plot. In no way did I feel slighted as a viewer, nor did I root for the hero any less because I wasn't told he was abandoned as a child and is lactose intolerant. In fact, the lack of back story is played for fun in a scene where the hero, innocently accused of murder, spins a tale of his faux criminal past for the woman to whom he is handcuffed while on the run. This humourous tale begins her turn of mind away from believing him to be a murderer to wondering exactly who he is, culminating shortly with her resolving that he is telling her the truth about the conspiracy into which he has fallen. It's an excellent film with all sorts of twists, and never for one moment does interest lag. Keeping in mind that the recent King Kong remake is almost twice as long as the orginal with no new story to speak of, maybe filmmakers just did a better job telling stories before the toys of technology overwhelmed them with choices galore. All I know is that these recent viewings have me more excited about catching up on cinema history than on any new release Hollywood may have in the offing. Well, at least until the next Harold and Kumar movie comes out.

This is why 24 is the best hour of television I have ever seen: the moment when Jack, with his knife pressing up against Walt Cummings' eye, opens with "You've read my file," then proceeds to explain to Cummings exactly how he's going to gut him. Because Cummings knows what we all know: that Jack will do whatever it takes in the service of his country, and that Cummings can expect no mercy, especially in light of his having ordered the assassination of former President Palmer. I didn't expect Jack to start cutting, because I believed Walt would cave. But my wife looked away, fearful of the bloodletting to come. When a TV show - the hallmark of predictability - can do that to you, then you know you are in the presence of greatness.

More great moments: Aaron's lack of surprise at Walt's involvement, and his complicity in Jack's confrontation with Walt and Logan. Mrs. Logan's dismissive attitude towards her repentant husband. Bill putting Lynn in his place. Jack telling Logan he'll disappear again when this is over.

All this, and we still haven't seen the return of Kim Bauer. Bring it on!

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Turns out I was wrong the other day about the Hays Code. Although drafted in 1930, it didn't really take effect until 1934. The delicacy of Rain in respect of Sadie's morals was either due to an attempt to comply with the Code in light of a rising tide of support for its dictates, or maybe that's just the way people did things back then. I suspect the former.

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Now Brian Tobin has dropped out of the Liberal leadership hunt. The candidates get weaker all the time, although I never personally considered Tobin a legitimate contender. Once a shining paragon of virtue, choosing family over power in returning to Newfoundland, he later revealed himself as a crass opportunist. His absence from the race is no great loss to the country.

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Here's a very personal comment. I left home this morning without first doing up my fly. This has never happened to me before. More disconcerting, I spent 15 minutes walking around my apartment like that, with neither my wife (unfortunately) nor daughters (fortunately) noticing. Also fortunately, I was wearing a long overcoat and was able to correct this error on the sly without anyone seeing. (Well, I thought it was on the sly. There may have been someone who wondered what the hell was happening with my hands. Thankfully, no police were involved.) Now, here's my question: Am I a subconscious flasher, or this an early sign of Alzheimer's? Dear God, please let me be a flasher.

I scored on 34 out of 40 of my predictions, or 85%, which seems like a pretty good success ratio to me. Where did I miss? For best picture, Capote and Munich slipped in ahead of A History of Violence and The Constant Gardener. In this case, I overestimated my own and the critics opinion of History as well as the potential backlash against Munich. As for Capote, it was on my list up to the moment I typed it, when I went with my gut and picked Gardener based on "buzz" and my instinct that Capote would be this year's overlooked prestige picture. The same explains my one miss in the best director category.

As for actors, I missed only by picking Russell Crowe over Terrence Howard for best actor, although Howard was my single "other contender", and I figured all along that if he slipped in it would be at Crowe's expense. Every year it seems there is one previously unknown performer, usually an actress, who gets great reviews and nabs his or her film's lone nomination. Although Hustle & Flow also grabbed a best song nom, Howard essentially fills this quota in 2006.

Finally, I missed a pair in the screenplay categories, placing Syriana on my adaptation list instead of original where it belonged and overlooking Munich for best adaptation. This I lay at the feet of the Writer's Guild, who, presumably due to a different qualification standard, tabbed Syriana as an adaptation. Without this false intell, I would have listed it in the original category over Cinderella Man and placed Munich in my final adaptation slot. If I take credit for this - and I am - it ups my percentage to 90%. Take away my last-minute loss of faith in Capote, and I'm up to 95%. Pretty good, I must say. Useless, but pretty good.

For the record, I have seen 10 of the nominated films, and will see at least one more (Crash) on TMN before the awards are handed out. Hopefully, I can figure out some way to see Munich, Capote, Syriana and Walk the Line in theatres over the next month. If I can, I'll have more of a rooting interest in the Oscars - the only awards show I watch - than at any time in the last dozen years.

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Now that both John Manley and Frank McKenna have decided they don't want to lead the Liberal party, the field is much weaker and completely wide open. Although it's not so wide open that a guy like Joe Volpe could win it. No disrespect intended, but anyone who thinks Volpe is a future Prime Minister is probably a relative.

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Last night in film class we watched the original King Kong. If you overlook the cheesy special effects (especially the quite comical head shots of Kong), which were revolutionary for their time, this is in some ways superior to Peter Jackson's recent remake. At half the running time, the story certainly moves much faster, and I don't think it hurts the film any. All the time spent on character development in the remake, and I don't feel it gave me any more of a sense of what drives Carl Denham than the original did in a few quick scenes. The Ann Darrow character benefited from having a more evolved back story in the remake, but it could have been done in less screen time. The remake Jack Driscoll is definitely superior, with a more adventurous side than the original, who tends to hide until danger has passed, but he was still an ineffectual romantic lead. The true romantic male lead in the remake is Kong, and the development of his character from more than a brute makes his commitment to Ann, which ultimately seals his doom, more believable. But the original is still a great film, and one can easily see what drew Jackson to it. The evocation of an unknown world, the sense of adventure, the beautiful girl in peril, the dashing (well, sort of) leading man, the rampant destruction of property - all things a young lad would be attracted to.

My Oscar predictions, offered without comment so I can get them up before the nominations are announced later this morning. I used to do this every year, but haven't in a while because I simply wasn't in tune with the movies. That, to say the least, is no longer the case. My methodology is to look at the early results of award season, with special emphasis on the Guilds and Golden Globes, as well as critics awards, reviews, "buzz" and my own gut feeling about who is "hot" or "due", shifting concepts worthy of quotation marks in this context. Although I consider my own opinions, as you'll see, ala Brokeback Mountain, they are not definitive of my choices. Historically, I've been 70 to 80% accurate in predicting the major categories. Let's see how I do this year.

FILM
Brokeback Mountain
Good Night, and Good Luck
A History of Violence
Crash
The Constant Gardener

Other contenders: Munich, Capote, King Kong, Walk the Line

DIRECTOR
Ang Lee - Brokeback Mountain
George Clooney - Good Night, and Good Luck
Steven Spielberg - Munich
Paul Haggis - Crash
Fernando Meirelles - The Constant Gardener

Other contenders: David Cronenberg - A History of Violence, Bennett Miller - Capote, Peter Jackson - King Kong

ACTOR
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Capote
Heath Ledger - Brokeback Mountain
David Strathairn - Good Night, and Good Luck
Joaquin Phoenix - Walk The Line
Russell Crowe - Cinderella Man

Other contender: Terence Howard - Hustle & Flow

ACTRESS
Reese Witherspoon - Walk the Line
Felicity Hoffman - Transamerica
Judi Dench - Mrs. Henderson Presents
Keira Knightley - Pride & Prejudice
Charlize Theron - North Country

Other contenders: Laura Linney - The Squid and the Whale, Joan Allen - The Upside of Anger, Naomi Watts - King Kong

SUPPORTING ACTOR
Paul Giamatti - Cinderella Man
Matt Dillon - Crash
Jake Gyllenhaal - Brokeback Mountain
George Clooney - Syriana
William Hurt - A History of Violence

Other contenders: Frank Langella - Good Night, and Good Luck, Don Cheadle - Crash, Terence Howard - Crash, Ed Harris - A History of Violence, Mickey Rourke - Sin City

SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Amy Adams - Junebug
Catherine Keener - Capote
Rachel Weisz - The Constant Gardener
Michelle Williams - Brokeback Mountain
Frances McDormand - North Country

Other contenders: Maria Bello - A History of Violence, Scarlett Johansson - Match Point, Thandie Newton - Crash

ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
The Squid and the Whale
Good Night, and Good Luck
Crash
Match Point
Cinderella Man

ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
Capote
Brokeback Mountain
A History of Violence
The Constant Gardener
Syriana

We'll see how smart I am in a few hours.

My passion for sudoku lasted a little more than a week. I am now officially burned out. In the end, the puzzles just aren't that interesting. They tend to be either not challenging enough, or so challenging that frustration is the only reasonable response. Some people love this stuff, but I just think I have better things to do with my recreation - watch porn, eat chocolate, watch porn while eating chocolate - there, that about covers it.

As for porn and chocolate, or any food for that matter, I haven't been to a strip club in some 15 years, but what I never understood then and don't now is how people can eat in those places. Setting aside any questions about what might be going on in the kitchen of such an establishment, I just know that I have no interest in fries and gravy when some hottie is waving her secret spots in my face. The only rationale I can come up with is to give patrons something else to do with their hands.

Continuing in this vein, I came across a really interesting show on Sex TV while channel surfing this morning. It was about laws regulating the sex business in New York City, or at least as they were a few years ago during the Rudy G. era. One rule was that no strip club, sex shop or whatever could be more than 500 feet from a school, church, residence or another sex establishment. Another was that a facility could dedicate only 40% of its space to items or practices which might be considered obscene. (I missed the beginning of the program, but I assume there is a by-law of some sort defining obscenity.) What's interesting about this second point is that they showed a sex shop called Toys in Babeland with dildos and vibrators all over the place, which the owner explained were not considered obscene by the City. Huh?! What exactly did the good people of NYC think those things were for? One side effect of this law was that strip clubs were forced to use valuable space once reserved for naked women to set up pool tables and big-screen TVs to get to the 40% level. Accordingly, strippers were losing their jobs, a tragedy unparalleled in human history. Of course, one clever entrepreneur got around this by starting a company called Models to Go, wherein strippers traveled the city in stretch limousines and, I guess, picked up customers along the way. The logic behind this was that automobiles were considered private space and not covered by the law. A great idea, well executed.

* * * * *

Just to show I am not completely obsessed with sex today - I am at work after all, and anyone who's ever been to my office would know sex is the last thing on my mind when I'm here - our man Keifer Sutherland took home a Screen Actors Guild award last night for best actor in a TV drama for 24. This was his fourth consecutive nomination and second win, to go with a Golden Globe won after the first half of season one. He now has lost four times for the Emmy, but I expect he enjoys this consolation prize considering it comes from his peers. As an observer, I certainly think the SAG awards have surpassed all others in assessing what the truly good performances were of the year past.

By the way, I'll be offering my Oscar nomination predictions tomorrow a.m., but two winners from last night certainly auger well for some. First, Crash won best ensemble, generally considered the SAG "best picture" award. I thought Crash might be overlooked in award season because it was released so early in 2005, but clearly that has not been a problem. It should come up big tomorrow. Second, Rachel Weisz's win for supporting actress, coupled with her Golden Globe win, puts her way out in front of critics darling Catherine Keener for the Oscar. Clearly, Hollywood has made it's preference known.

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On the subject of Toronto being ignored by our new prime minister, it turns out our mayor expressed publicly a thought that had also occurred to me. Reason dictates that Harper should do what he can to impress us, since the key to moving from minority to majority government may be winning a few seats in T.O. Starting from his base of zero, even a shift of five seats away from the Liberals would be significant. The potential is there, of course, for much more. Add to this the fact that the provincial Liberal government may be a barrier to him doing things for us and Harper has the potential for a big win without any risk, by simply offering things to us then blaming the provincial Liberals when they don't happen, meanwhile co-opting our mayor as his mouthpiece. Either way, I think we'll be okay under P.M. Harper. It's the rest of the country I am concerned about.

One's response to artistic endeavours is, of course, very personal and subjective. Although I have opinions about the movies I see, the books I read and the music I hear, they are after all nothing more than opinions. For people I know with a shared sensibility, my opinions can be useful in saving them two hours at the movies and $20 on admission and popcorn. For anyone else who stumbles across this space, it's just another voice in the mist, to be weighed in accordance with whatever scale you personally use.

Because it is personal, strange things can happen. For example, I can say with great confidence that Hilary Duff has minimal ability as both a singer and actor. On the other hand, I can also acknowledge that she has considerable charm and likability. For many, and not just pre-teen girls, they can overlook what their eyes and ears tell them and enjoy her for what she is - a non-threatening bubble gum pop princess who will leave our lives in a few years not to be heard from again until - ala Debbie Gibson, Dana Plato, etc. - her money runs out and she appears naked on glossy pages at your local convenience store. Her sister Haylie, on the other hand, may torture us a bit longer given the slight bit of cred she earned with her performance in Napoleon Dynamite (which just gets funnier every time I watch it), although if you pay attention her "acting" is no more than a pout and a snarl. (Although, thinking about it now, the only performances in that movie that are more than one note repeated are from Jon Gries and Tina Majorino, both of whom I have seen in several movies and/or TV shows, although in ND Gries was completely unrecognizable.)

When it comes to music, this can explain why my daughter Brittany has Ms. Duff on her mp3 player next to tunes by blink-182 and, her current favorite and the bane of her mother's existence, "My Humps". It also explains why I absolutely love that song "Alive" by Melissa O'Neal of Canadian Idol fame and, for that matter, why Kelly Clarkson doesn't completely suck anymore. Or why I enjoyed Mariah Carey's We Belong Together after more than a decade of loathing every song she released. Or why Justin Timberlake went from sucking 90% of the time in N'Sync (getting a pass from these ears for only "Bye Bye Bye" and "It's Gonna Be Me") to a string of solid solo tunes, or why every song by Usher is lame except for "Yeah" and "Caught Up". The ears know what they like, and an artist's past aural crimes are forgiven under the assault of "Since U Been Gone".

My listening is all over the map. This weekend I have been playing Dashboard Confessional on my Dell DJ, and expect to for a few days more. Last week at work it was Elliott Smith and The Offspring, this week it may be Rob Thomas or Nine Inch Nails. I can't generalize about the music I like, although I am a sucker for clever or witty lyrics. I like a lot of power pop bands like Fountains of Wayne, and I listen to a lot of emo, although emo is really power pop with louder guitars and pierced nipples. Then there is my affection for the likes of Elvis Costello and Fiona Apple, for Brand New and Frank Sinatra, for Johnny Cash and Bob Dylan. As long as my ears don't think it sucks, I'm there.

The reason for my writing the above is because I have been listening to "best of" collections from two classic Canadian bands from the late '80s and early '90s, and reconsidering their position in the heirarchy for their era. With apologies to my friend Keith, I have concluded that the great Canadian rock band from that time is not the Tragically Hip. No, my friend, it is The Pursuit of Happiness. The first track on the CD is "I'm An Adult Now", and I remain surprised that this classic song has never made it into a movie (according to IMDb). As a reminder, the lyrics (skipping the choruses), courtesy of http://www.lyricsdownload.com:

Well, I don't hate my parents
I don't get drunk just to spite them
I've got my own reasons to drink now
Think I'll call my dad up and invite him
I can sleep in till noon anytime I want
Though there's not many days that I do
Gotta get up and take on that world
When your an adult it's no cliche it's the truth

I can't even look at young girls anymore
People will think I'm some kind of pervert
Adult sex is either boring or dirty
Young people they can get away with murder
I don't write songs about girls anymore
I have to write songs about women
No more boy meets girl boy loses girl
More like man tries to figure out what the hell went wrong

I can't take any more illicit drugs
I can't afford any artificial joy
I'd sure look like a fool dead in a ditch somewhere
With a mind full of chemicals
Like some cheese-eating high school boy

Sometimes my head hurts and sometimes my stomach hurts
And I guess it won't be long
Till I'm sitting in a room with a bunch of people whose necks and backs are aching
Whose sight and hearing's failing
Who just can't seem to get it up
Speaking of hearing, I can't take too much loud music
I mean I like to play it, but I sure don't like the racket
Noise, but I can't hear anything
Just guitars screaming, screaming, screaming
Some guy screaming in a leather jacket
Wooah!

Thank you, Moe Berg, for that slice of musical heaven. But it's the second song that nails down TPOH's greatness. It's a cover of Prince's "When Doves Cry", and what makes it so great is that it sounds exactly like a TPOH original should sound like until you realize it's a remake and you are then floored by how they managed to retain the feel of the original while adding their own distinctive touches. It is exactly the way a cover should be done - respectful, but not reverent. The rest of the album floats along in the same vein, with the classics all fans know ("She's So Young", "Cigarette Dangles") along with some greats we forgot and a few sparkling new gems. Moe Berg just doesn't release enough new stuff, but I hope this album sold enough to get him back in action.

Oh, and the Tragically Hip? Well, when you listen to their hits one after the other, you realize how boring and similar it all is. For me, they are a band best heard in a stream with other bands, not in isolation. Of course, that's just my opinion. But it's all I have.

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By the way, in searching IMDb for usage of "I'm An Adult Now", I came across this short film directed in 1993 by the one and only Ben Affleck: I Killed My Lesbian Wife, Hung Her on a Meat Hook, and Now I Have a Three-Picture Deal at Disney. I have a lot more interest in seeing this than, say, Bounce or Gigli.

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I watched two more movies this weekend. Last night, it was, finally, White Chicks, and it's the funniest film I've seen since The Wedding Crashers. This afternoon, it was Kurosawa's justly-considered classic Seven Samurai. As you can tell, I like to mix things up. Maybe I'll check out some porn tonight.